I Know

for a long time, I know there will be them that I will never know, though I try to close to them, I know I cannot do that, they already become a different world for me after all, they are so hard to be reached by my own hand. Because of that reason, I try to deny them even ignore them, but at last I realize they already become part of me.

slowly but surely, they and I cannot be separated, though they give me many meaningful things but in the same time they hurt me with smile. I know that. They try to get into my life, interfere me, confront me, when I ask why, then they smile and easily say because they love me that is why they can do that. I know that.

I want to close my eyes, that is the only thing that I can think concerning them. I know with close my eyes, I know will never see them, I know I can say easily they are just dream in my life or no more than voice in my head, then I know I can smile just by knowing that, though it is just a lie. I know it is just a lie. Beautiful lie.

Because when I open my eyes, I know someday they will be there, looking at me, waiting for my reaction, though I try my best to deny them even run from them, I know I cannot escape, I know they already handcuff me tightly, and close the door so I cannot go anywhere. At the end the only thing that I know they never want to release me.

I know.